The Red Stocking

Our newly formed writing group decided we should write a short story about Christmas. This is mine. It’s a bit cheesy and could do with some editing but here is the first draft.

***

Henry was scared. It was cold and dark and he could hear the booming planes flying overhead. He huddled in closer to his mother’s side and tried hard to pull the last bit of her coat around him. Still dressed in the blue striped pyjamas his aunt had made him, he wished that his mother had let him put some proper clothes on before they left the house. She’d managed to pull a jumper over his head before giving him his coat to put on.

“Come on, come on,” she yelled. “We’ve got to go. Put your boots on quick.”

They ran out of the house, the sirens singing in the frosty air, and headed for the underground station. People were pouring down the entrance steps and Henry almost let go of his mother’s hand. He didn’t like it when the sirens went off. He knew that he would be pulled along by his mother and made to sit in the noisy underground with hundreds of others. But this time was different, because this time it was Christmas Eve.

As Henry tried to get comfy on the hard concrete ground he thought of his stocking hanging on the fireplace. He’d tried so hard to be a good boy all year. His mother had needed him to be and although he missed his father so much, he knew that he was being brave overseas. He wondered what Father Christmas would bring him; he didn’t care, anything would give him the biggest smile on Christmas morning.

A woman came round and started talking to Henry’s mother. She had a trolley with her and Henry could see the steam coming from the watering can shaped teapot that sat on top. Oh, how he wished to feel it’s warmth on his skin.

Suddenly the sound of a German aircraft rumbled directly overhead. It was so loud that Henry had to put his hands over his ears to buffer the noise. The underground went silent as everyone held their breath, silently praying that it would pass over and fly on. But the silence was short lived and was quickly filled with shrieks and gasps of terror as the whistling bomb was dropped not far from the entrance to the underground.

The bombardment near Aldwych station continued for several hours and as each plane flew overhead the crowds grew silent once more waiting for that one deathly bomb that may end their lives. Eventually the groan of the planes began to soften and the whistling was no more. The sirens resonated through the night sky marking the all clear and gradually families, men, women and children began their ascent out to the ground level.

As Henry and his mother emerged from the dark passageway the true horror engulfed their every sense. The ringing of bells from the fire engines and ambulances filled their ears. The heat from the fires that raged all around warmed their skin. The smell was unbearable, burning rubble, metal and bodies killed by the Nazis.

Henry’s mother silently pulled her son close to her and quickly marched him home. She wanted things to be normal, she wanted her son to be sheltered from this scene. But it was not to be. The house was gone, just a pile of bricks and dust remained in its place. It was all gone.

As the two of them stood there staring at the space that was once their safe haven, unable to believe that their lives had been destroyed, a group of neighbours gathered around them. Mrs Adams, from number 11, put her arm on Henry’s shoulder and grabbed his mother’s hand tight. The gathering stood there in silence for what seemed like eternity just trying to make sense of the situation. A tear ran down Henry’s cheek as he thought of his stocking buried underneath all that rubble but he knew he had to be brave and fought back the tears that wanted to follow.

Eventually Mrs Adams gestured for the homeless family to follow her and she lead them to her home. She was one of the lucky ones with a home to go to.

“Please come in,” Mrs Adams said sweetly. “Let me make you some tea. I will light the fire and we can all get warm.”

Henry and his mother sat down at the table in the small family room whilst their host poked and prodded at the contents of the fireplace. After a few minutes the room began to heat up and the kettle was boiling on the stove. Henry began to feel warm, safe and very sleepy and couldn’t fight the yawns back any longer.

“You can both stay here until you get yourselves sorted,” Mrs Adams whispered softly as she handed Henry a steaming cup of tea. “I’m afraid I can only offer you the front room with a settee to sleep on but it’s comfortable and it’s warm.”

“I can’t thank you enough,” Henry’s mother humbly replied. “Henry really should be in bed. He will be so tired tomorrow.”

“Are you excited about Father Christmas coming, young man?” Mrs Adams excitedly asked.
Henry looked at his mother and then at his neighbour and gave a sad smile. “He won’t know where I am and my stocking is gone.”

“Oh, Father Christmas is very clever, he always knows where all the boys and girls are.” Mrs Adams smiled brightly back.

“Come on Henry. Finish your tea and we’ll put you to bed.” His mother was keen to change the subject. She knew she couldn’t get him anything by morning and she felt so helpless not being able to give her son the one thing he wanted.

Mrs Adams laid out some blankets on the settee for Henry and his mother carried him to his make-shift bed. She gave him a big, loving cuddle full of sadness and despair. He tried not to notice but he gave her a kiss on her cheek to let her know it was okay.

Henry tried to sleep but he could hear his mother and Mrs Adams talking in the next room. His mother had finally let go and was sobbing uncontrollably. He could hear her muffled words asking what she was going to do and how was she going to provide for her son. Mrs Adams tried to console her and Henry could hear her sweet, gentle voice soothing his mother’s protests.

Some time in the early hours of the morning Henry finally gave in and fell asleep. He tossed and turned dreaming of the loud noises and the bright lights of the raid that occurred during the night. He also dreamt of his stocking buried deep under the remnants of his home. He knew Father Christmas wouldn’t know where to put his present and he knew Christmas day was not going to happen.

He eventually woke from his broken sleep and realised the light had risen though the dark sky. He looked around the room for his mother but she was no where to be seen. There was just a neat pile of sheets sitting on the arm chair in the corner.

Henry put his feet to the floor and stretched. He gradually rose from the settee and headed for the door that lead to the family room. He opened it slowly, hearing the creaking hinges as he did. On the other side stood a grinning Mrs Adams holding a large cup of tea.

“Morning!” she exclaimed happily. “Merry Christmas Henry.”

“Merry Christmas,” his mother smiled from her position at the table.

Henry looked around the room. There were paper chains hanging from every corner, sprigs of holly filling the top of the sideboard and there was a full table of food just waiting for them to tuck in. The fire was burning brightly keeping them warm and from the mantle hung a single red sock filled with nobly gifts. Henry looked up at Mrs Adams and across to his mother in amazement.

“He found you Henry,” his mother explained. “The stocking is for you.”

Henry beamed and continued to look at the two women in bewilderment. His mother nodded to reassure him it was true and he ran to fireplace. He excitedly grabbed the stocking and jumped up to the table. He pulled out the gifts one by one in such a hurry that his mother thought he would break one of them. An orange wrapped in paper, a few homemade sweets and a small wooden car. Henry couldn’t believe it. He had never seen such a beautiful toy car before and he thought to himself that he must be a very special boy to receive such a gift.

“Merry Christmas!” he yelled, laughing.

Homework no.5 – the script

So, our last lot of homework was to write a script for a short story. That was it, that was the brief. Fear gripped all of us and it was such a struggle to come up with anything. Some of the class didn’t achieve a single word as it was so out of our comfort zone but the completed scripts of those who did achieve something were great. I was really impressed.

Anyway, enough rabbiting on, here’s mine…

(Btw, the layout isn’t correct for a script but as soon as I get on to my computer I will put it right!)

THE HEIST

By

Cate Coles

INT. SAM AND GEOFF’S CAR – DAY

It’s mid-summer and the sun is shining bright. The car is parked at the side of the road in a busy high street. The inside of the car is piled high with belongings. SAM (female, early 30s, white) and GEOFF (male, mid-30s, white) sit in the front seats.

SAM

Are we really going to do this?

GEOFF

What choice do we have? We can’t live in the car forever.

SAM

But what are people going to think when we suddenly have the money to buy a house? How are we going to explain it to our families, to the kids?

GEOFF

We can’t think about that now. We’ll figure it out.

SAM

Figure it out? We’ve been trying to figure it out for months. We tried figuring it out when you lost your job, when we were up to eyeballs in debt, when we borrowed money from your folks. We even tried figuring it out when we lost the house. We need a plan this time.

GEOFF

All right. Okay. I hear you. Calm down. We’ve got to keep it together or this is never going to work. Just relax.

SAM

Oh my God, did you just tell me to relax? Seriously? You do know what we are about to do, don’t you?

GEOFF

Yes. Of course I do. What do you take me for? It’s just that we need to stay calm otherwise we are seriously going to mess this up and we could be in a worse position than we already are.

SAM

Okay. Okay. So, have we got everything?

Sam starts fussing and pulls out a scruffy hand-written list from her handbag.

SAM

Right. Gloves?

GEOFF

Yep.

SAM

Balaclavas?

GEOFF

Yes. Here’s yours.

Geoff hands Sam a hand knitted balaclava knitted in several different colour wools.

SAM

Thank you. Guns?

GEOFF

Uh, yes. Oh, wait a minute, what have I done with yours?

Sam rolls her eyes as Geoff looks around the front seats. He checks the glove compartment and brings out a gun. He hands it to Sam without really looking at it.

SAM

That’s not it! That’s Jake’s toy one. Can’t you tell the difference?

GEOFF

Sorry. It looks so similar.

Sam turns to the back seats and after rummaging for a while pulls out the correct gun from between two piles of clothing.

SAM

Right, you said we also need to take the tools in that bag. What do we need them for anyway?

GEOFF

Just in case we need to break into anything.

SAM

Like what?! I thought we were just going in, getting the money and getting out again. Even the guns are just for show. No one is going to get hurt, right Geoff? I’m not doing this if anyone is going to get hurt.

GEOFF

Of course no one is going to get hurt. We just might need to break into drawers or something. I don’t know. I’ve never done this before. I just need to know we’ve got everything we need. It’s once in and once out. If we forget anything then that’s it.

Sam and Geoff put their gloves on and their balaclavas on the tops of their heads ready to pull down. Sam breathes very deeply.

GEOFF

Are you ready?

SAM

Ready as I will ever be. I love you.

GEOFF

I love you too. What ever happens just remember that.

Sam and Geoff quickly kiss and lower their homemade balaclavas.

EXT. STREET OUTSIDE OF BANK – DAY

Sam and Geoff look at each other one last time and get out of the car. Geoff runs towards the bank and Sam follows up behind him. They pause before they push their way through the main double doors.

INT. BANK – DAY

THE BANK

is airy with tall ceilings. Light is pouring through the large windows and the dust sparkles in the beams of sunlight. The sound of a radio can be heard in the distance.

Sam and Geoff both run into the middle of the room manically pointing their guns at the people stood around.

GEOFF

This is a hold up. We want all the cash.

Laughter begins to bubble up and Sam and Geoff look around confused. It slowly dawns on them that all the people in the bank are builders, carpenters and general workmen.

FAT BUILDER

‘Ere mate, I think you’ve got the wrong bank or maybe the wrong day. We’ve been doing this place up for months and it won’t have any money in it for weeks yet! Maybe you should try the one across the road.

All the workmen laugh louder.

Sam and Geoff look at each other. Sam begins to sob and runs out of the bank with Geoff following her. She runs straight to the car, jumps in and slams the door before Geoff can get there. She scrapes the balaclava off her head and throws it into the back seat. Geoff slowly gets in the other side of the car.

GEOFF

What are you doing? You heard him, there’s another bank across the road. We can still get what we can for. Come on.

Sam gives him a look as if to say “You are not serious?”

Homework no.4 – The Book of Love

This week’s homework was to think of a gift you would buy the tutor and what it would be wrapped in. Take the tutor out of the equation and place the gift, unwrapped, next to dead body of a young adult. Now, write a short story about it. Here’s mine…

*****

The underside of the bridge was cast in shadow. In the deepest, darkest corner a woman was crouched into the join where the bridge met the road. She was almost hugging the bridge itself, hoping it would give her some comfort. Her eyes, however, were transfixed in one direction, in the direction of the young man who was lying cold and wet at the side of the road. The heavy rain poured down upon him and it washed the remnants of blood away that had been dripping out of the recent wound in his neck. The package he had been carrying was soaking and the brown paper wrapper was disintegrating with the heavy pounding of water.

She remembered how he had told her about it. He had bought a gift for his fiancé and he’d spent his entire week’s pay on it. He was going to give it to her the next afternoon and she was going to love him for it.

“It’s a leather bound notebook for her,” he gushed. “She loves to write poetry and I thought she could keep all her musings in here.”

He was so pleased with himself that Ettie almost felt jealous. How she wished someone so beautiful would buy her a gift he had thought so long and hard about. But that wouldn’t happen, not now. Not now that she had done the one thing she had been trying to fight off for so long.
She was still staring at his lifeless body watching him turn more and more pale, so much so that the skin began to turn translucent. She must have been there for several hours. Their short meeting had filled her with so many emotions and she remembered each one as she watched his life drain out.

It had been turning dark and she had stumbled on the bottom of her skirt as she crossed the street. The lace had become loose and she had told herself so many times to fix it but there never seemed time. Just as she felt she would fall a beautiful young gentleman, not much older that 18, stepped forward and reached for her hand. His grasp was so strong that it steadied her instantly.
“Thank you Sir,”she blushed. “You are very kind.”

“Glad to be of service miss. It would never do for a lady like yourself to fall in these streets.”
Ettie looked at the gentleman that had rescued her. She took in every sight and every smell in a split second. He was exquisite with his dark hair and dandy suit. He was so elegant and she wondered if she had ever seen such a beautiful looking man.

He bent down to pick up the package he had dropped during his rescue. He took great care to check it all over, brushing the dirt from the side that had hit the ground.

“Oh, I do hope it’s not damaged,” Ettie said apologetically. “Is it something quite precious?”

He then launched into a flurry of chatter about the package, his fiancé and how he loved her so, smiling the entire time. As the slight tremor of jealousy rumbled, the feeling hit her right in the pit of her stomach. She had fought this feeling so many times, she could do it one more time. But it was too late.

Suddenly she grabbed him, her strength greater than any man she had ever met. She pinned him against the wall of narrow street and let the rush of desire take over. Her perfect white teeth sank deep into the pumping vein within his neck. She drank hard, letting the thirst take over her body. She had wanted this for so many years, she had fought it off but at that moment she let the thought wonder through her mind, why?

The smooth red liquid ran hot down her throat and she could feel it engulfing her entire body. The feeling of life grew inside her and she felt more alive than she ever had. This was why they did it, those monsters that had attacked her three years ago. They knew what the blood would do to them. Oh, why had she fought it for so long?

And then she heard it, his heart growing weak and faint. He was dying right there in her arms. She drew back her teeth and cradled his head in her hand as she lowered him to the ground. What had she done? He was so pale and lifeless. She dropped his body on the hard floor and stared in absolute horror of the scene she had created. He was gone, the beautiful young gentleman she had wanted with every atom of her being. How could she have let this curse take her over? How could she do this? She felt sick to her stomach at what she had done.

Suddenly she realised that it had turned dark. She quickly looked all around her to see if anyone had seen what had just happened. Thankfully the street was quiet and deserted; there were no witnesses to this chilling scene. She needed to leave; she needed to get away to somewhere safe but she felt she couldn’t leave him. She took refuge underneath the bridge, being careful to stick to the shadows. She could stay here even when it got light, the darkness would protect her. She would stay until someone found him. He needed a decent burial; he needed some dignity in his death.

Just as dawn was encroaching on the city a young boy on bicycle headed up the quiet street, his wheels clattering on the cobbled path. Instantly he saw the young man and dropped his bicycle as he crept closer. Ettie watched as he bravely poked the body to see if there was any life left. He stepped back in fright of what was before him and turned to run. He yelled the whole way to end of the street and eventually Ettie heard the whistle from the approaching policeman. It was time to leave.

Homework no.3 – no title

In our writing course last week we were asked to give our tutor 10 names, any names, famous or unknown. From those names we had to choose two and right them down. Once we had done that we were told that we had to write a short story about those two characters for homework.

I sat in my chill-out room, listening to Huw Stephens on the radio, and wrote for two hours. I started and finished my short story within that time, printed it off and didn’t read it again until tonight in class. It’s a first draft, not a finished piece but that is how we are told to write.

So, enjoy the first draft. Oh, and if you can think of a title let me know. I’m useless at titles!

***

Neither Flash Gordon or Audrey Hepburn were given their names at birth. Audrey, formally Emma Bates, was obsessed with her namesake and changed her name by deed pole, to her parents disgust, roughly 18 months ago. Flash, formally Finn Gordon, had adopted the name change when Adam, his lead guitarist, suggested it one drunken night in New York. The whole band fell about in hysterics as the conversation continued but once sober Finn and his boys thought it would give him an air of mystery and strength. It would be good for their image.

Whether the aliases were the reason these two were drawn to each other no-one knows. To look at them you would think they had nothing in common. Audrey with her black wiggle dress, pearls, and handbag draped over her forearm was highly polished and quite stunning. Flash, on the other hand, wore tight ripped jeans, a t-shirt that looked like it hadn’t seen the inside of a washing machine in months and had his long bleached hair back-combed and hair sprayed as big as he could get it.

Flash and Audrey had been travelling with the band for several months now and had ended up at a dingy motel just on the outskirts of Seattle. It seemed a million miles away from Audrey’s life back in England but she was so glad she had met Flash and that he’d rescued her from a life of working as a secretary and marrying the man her parents approved of. For that she’d be forever grateful.

Despite the ever-growing Grunge scene at the Gorilla Gardens, the gig had gone well that night and they’d all stayed there late drinking and taking whatever they got offered by the other bands. Sometime around 3am they stumbled into the van that had seen them safely across thousands of miles of America and carried on partying at their temporary home.

Flash squeezed his eyes open and waited for the hangover to hit his body but nothing came. In fact, he felt nothing, almost numbness but not any numbness he’d felt before. He managed to push himself up to sitting position and he looked around the room. From his viewpoint he realised he must have fallen asleep on the floor. It must have been a good night! Then he noticed her, Audrey, yelling at some guy in uniform stood in the middle of the room. Both of them were gesturing at something he couldn’t quite see and Audrey had trails of mascara running down her cheeks.

Flash leapt up and rushed over to where they were standing and instantly saw the scene. There was a gunshot wound right through the side of his head, right there in front of him. The poor bastard was dead, the poor bastard that seemed to have his boots on. And his jeans, and had the same hair, and was wearing the silver engraved ring Audrey had bought him. The realisation of who it was slammed into his brain so suddenly that he felt he was going to throw up. He doubled up and waited for the contents of his stomach to appear but of course nothing happened, he was dead.

What the hell had happened? The last thing he remembered was being happy, enjoying being with his best friends, being with his girl. What had gone wrong? Just as he was trying to recall the sequence of events, two paramedics crashed through the door and interrupted his thoughts. They calmly moved Audrey and the cop out of the way and lifted Flash’s body on to the waiting gurney. Audrey asked if she could go with him in the ambulance and reluctantly the taller of the two paramedics agreed. Flash ran to the door and yelled at his girlfriend, “What are you doing? Where the hell are you going? You need to tell me what the fuck is going on!” but she didn’t hear him. She didn’t even register that he was there.

The taller paramedic gave Audrey a helping hand into the back of the ambulance and Flash quickly jumped in behind them before the doors shut. He sat opposite the two living beings and stared. His mind drifted back to hours of the early morning. They were drinking, they had bought lots of beer at the local five and dime and Adam was smoking something potent. Then it flashed through his mind, he remembered Adam and Audrey arguing just outside of the motel room door. It had been heated and Adam had grabbed her arm. She squirmed from his grasp and looked at him like there was more to this argument than just a one-off. What had they been talking about? What was going on between them?

The ambulance jolted as it went through a pothole and Flash came back to the here and now. He was still staring but only at Audrey now. She was quiet and she wasn’t crying. Was she not upset? Was she not devastated by his death? Did she not give a crap about him? That was when he remembered he had confronted them, his best friend and his girl. He had accused them of having an affair, of sleeping with each other behind his back. He raged with anger and screamed at that them for what seemed like eternity. Both of them denied it, of course, but he thought of all the times they had been talking somewhere else and suddenly stopped as soon as Flash approached. It was true, of course it was true. He remembered walking away from them and sitting in the corner of the motel room hoping the remnants of Adam’s score would take him somewhere else.

The ambulance pulled up outside of the ER but there was no rushing, no sense of emergency. Flash was gone and there was no reason to try and bring him back. Audrey was stopped from entering the building by the same cop who had been at the motel. “Miss Hepburn,” he heard the cop say calmly. “We need you to come down to the precinct and answer some questions. You have the right to remain silent,” he continued. Flash didn’t need to hear the rest of the statement; he’d heard it too many times at the end of hard night’s partying. Maybe he should go with her, make sure she’s okay or maybe he should go with his body. After all he needed to figure out what was to happen next. As he looked longingly at the girl he had loved for too many years he thought of that argument and realised he needed to take care of himself now.

As Audrey sat in the back of the car facing the cage between herself and the two men who were going to ask her all sorts of awkward questions she thought of that argument earlier with Adam and what had followed. She hated Adam, she’d always hated him. How could Flash have thought they were having an affair? She despised him and he despised her. They only pretended to get on because they had agreed to for Flash’s sake. But he wanted her gone. He wanted to be a band again with no girlfriends interrupting their road to success. How were they ever going to make it with her holding back the best singer Adam had ever known to wail out his tunes?

Adam sat on cold metal fire escape at the back of the motel room. He was shivering and his head hurt so badly that he felt it might actually explode. He thought of that argument, of what had happened. His stomach swam with grief as he looked at the black Jericho 941that was still being cradled by his right hand. Why did he have to protect her? Why did he have step in between them? Oh God, what had he done?

Okay, positive statement. Ringing affirmative. I’m a writer.

Last Tuesday night I started my new college course. For those who know me this isn’t anything new. I have been doing evening courses for several years now, some for fun and some for work but I always try and do something challenging. And so far, I think this is the most challenging of the lot. Why? Because you have to really put yourself out there, open yourself up for scrutiny. Not always a thing most people look forward to.

So what it this course? Creative Writing! Yes, I know it’s not something I’ve screamed and shouted about before but I do enjoy writing. I have been writing a horror story for several years now but have never really got very far and I’m hoping this course will help. It may also help me blog more, which I have been moaned at about before.

We had homework on our first lesson and had to take it tonight to read out to the group. Oh my god, I was so scared. My stomach literally flipped every time I thought about it but it was actually much better than expected. The rest of my group were very constructive and made me feel better about my small piece. So what did I write? Well, we had to write a hook, the beginning of a story that would grab the reader and make them want to read more. Here is mine…

(if you don’t like it or quite frankly aren’t interested, I don’t really care. I’ve put myself out there and weirdly it felt good!)

“Sarah couldn’t quite see. She needed a torch to see right at the back. She knew her Daddy kept one in the cupboard under the stairs but she wasn’t sure if she could reach it. The stupid babysitter wasn’t going to help, she was too interested in giggling down the phone at her boyfriend.
Sarah grabbed the back of a dining room chair and dragged it into the cupboard. She climbed up on to the seat and looked through the clutter of light bulbs, cleaning products and dusty, unloved candles on the shelf. She wrapped her small hand around the heavy torch base and lifted it carefully over the jar of screws, nails and other metal paraphernalia.
Once the torch was safely away from any hazardous jars she ran back to the kitchen to the open cupboard that sat directly under the sink. She flicked the torch on with both thumbs and illuminated the dark space. Now she could see, she could see right to the back. As she moved the beam around the dark box she saw something move. It startled her and she fell back in fright on to her bum. A small wince came across her face as the sharp pain went through her body.
Now, most children would slam the door shut and run away but Sarah wasn’t most children. She was determined and curious and just had to know what it was. She grabbed the torch that had escaped her grasp and shone it back into the cupboard and there it was, a tiny creature, bold as brass, in full military regalia, all shiny and crisp. He stood in front of an arched doorway that was only a few centimetres taller than he was. It was ornate for such a small door, it wouldn’t have looked out of place as the entrance to a grand cathedral.
Suddenly the creature, having been frozen by the blinding light, reached for the gold dolphin shaped door handle. In a blink of eye he pushed the door open and ran through it as fast as he could. Without thinking Sarah climbed into the cupboard and squeezed through the door to chase after him. If she had been any bigger she would’ve got stuck in the long corridor that continued at the same height as the tiny door.
Once she reached the end of the corridor Sarah realised she could stand freely. Wherever she was it was dark, not as dark as her bedroom when her Mummy turned out the night light, but still dark enough. As she tried to look around she remembered the heavy torch still in her hand. She quickly lifted it in front of her and and switched it back on. As soon as the light illuminated the space and she saw what was in front of her she slammed it back off and shut her eyes tight.”

my hermit phase!

So January is rubbish outside every year, but particularly this year with all the snow we’ve had over the last few days.  But there is joy to this bleak month and that is the new TV season.  Usually around this time I become a complete hermit in the evenings and am addicted to the flickering box in the corner of the room and this year is no different.

So it started on Sunday with the return of the final Celebrity Big Brother.  Yes, I know what you’re thinking, what that rubbish?  I know, I know, a lot of people hate Big Brother now but I’m afraid I have watched every single one since it started and quite frankly I don’t care.  It is mindless fluff, full of wannabes but I have a huge obsession with psychology and working people out, so this sort of show is perfect for me.  And it’s a great excuse to laugh at idiot z-list celebrities desperately trying to get their 5 minutes.

But this coming Sunday is going to throw everything up in the air and my Sky+ box is going to groan at the tight organisation of when it’s got to record all my favourite shows.

On Sunday we have the start of series 2 of Being Human.  A vampire, a werewolf and a ghost all sharing a house and desperately trying to appear as human beings.  Brilliant!  And what’s better, it’s British and the actors are first-class – Aidan Turner (Desperate Romantics), Russell Tovey (Little Dorrit, Gavin & Stacey), Lenora Crichlow (Sugar Rush, Material Girl) and Sinead Keenan (Doctor Who).

On Tuesday Survivors returns to the BBC with series 2.  I have been eagerly awaiting the return of this as I loved the first series.  It’s got a stellar cast of Max Beesley, Julie Graham, Paterson Joseph & the fabulous Zoe Tapper.  The story is based on the original 1970s TV series created by Terry Nation who was responsible for bringing many children’s nightmares to life with his most iconic creation, the Daleks.

This is then followed by the continuation of Eastwick series 1 which was rudely interrupted by the cheesy Christmas made-for-tv movie line-up on the Hallmark channel.  Based on the original film  and starring the incredibly sexy Paul Gross (Due South) as Darryl van Horne.

Further viewing this winter season will come in the guise of America’s Next Top Model, featuring short models (yeah, there is hope for me yet!), Grey’s Anatomy series 6 where we find out if it’s George or Izzy that has died, True Blood series 2 on FX, which I am so excited about as it has been teased as being a lot darker than the last series and, of course, the return of my beloved Doctor Who in the spring.  I’m still not sure about Matt Smith yet, but then it took me a while to warm to David Tennant and I would now count him amongst my favourite Doctors.

So, if you want me to join you for a coffee and a danish over the next few months, you’ll know where to find me – glued to the box!

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